Difference between revisions of "The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann"

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m (Undo edit by Akolyth (Talk) (3535527) Not necessary, it's not been a stat for several years and was on there for a very short time. I'm not even sure the redirect is necessary)
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{{Infobox|title=The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann|image=The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann aka Issue 97.jpg|imagewidth=200px}}
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  | image     = The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann aka Issue 97.jpg
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{{quotation|[[NPC#Zepheniah Mann|Zepheniah Mann]]|To my layabout, brain defective sons, [[NPC#Blutarch and Redmond Mann|Blutarch and Redmond]], I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud. }}
 
{{quotation|[[NPC#Zepheniah Mann|Zepheniah Mann]]|To my layabout, brain defective sons, [[NPC#Blutarch and Redmond Mann|Blutarch and Redmond]], I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud. }}
  
 
'''''The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann''''' is [[storyline]] content revealed in stages through [[hidden pages]] published in [[Patches|major updates]].  
 
'''''The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann''''' is [[storyline]] content revealed in stages through [[hidden pages]] published in [[Patches|major updates]].  
  
−
Nominally, the Last Will and Testament was originally presented as the background for the game's first [[Halloween event]], [[Harvest Event|first Haunted map]], and [[Ghost|first Halloween Monster]]. However, in the course of his [[w:Bequest|bequests]], Zepheniah Mann describes his reasons for relocating to the [[Badlands (Region)|Badlands]] and his unpleasant experiences there. Particularly, Zepheniah expressed his displeasure with his twin sons; and, so, he evenly divided the lands he purchased in the Americas between the two, establishing the basis for their conflict in the Badlands, known in the context of the ''[[Team Fortress 2]]'' game as the [[Storyline#Gravel_War|Gravel War]].  
+
Nominally, the Last Will and Testament was originally presented as the background for the game's first [[Halloween event]], [[Harvest Event|first Haunted map]], and [[Ghost|first Halloween Monster]]. However, in the course of his [[w:Bequest|bequests]], Zepheniah Mann describes his reasons for relocating to the [[Badlands (Region)|Badlands]] and his unpleasant experiences there. Particularly, Zepheniah expressed his displeasure with his twin sons; and, so, he evenly divided the lands he purchased in the Americas between the two, establishing the basis for their conflict in the Badlands, known in the context of the ''[[Team Fortress 2]]'' game as the [[Storyline#Gravel War|Gravel War]].  
  
−
Moreover, Zepheniah made bequests to other particular persons, thereby introducing them to the storyline. To [[Non-player characters#Barnabus Hale|Barnabas Hale]] he granted Mann & Sons Munitions Concern, which eventually became [[Mann Co.]] with Barnabas Hale's grandson [[Saxton Hale]] as CEO. To one [[Administrator#Elizabeth|Elizabeth]], he gave the [[w:Residuary estate|residue of his estate]] – Elisabeth is widely considered to be represented in the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/family_portrait/ ''Family Portrait''] as the woman sitting next to Zepheniah, bearing a passing fair resemblance to the [[Administrator|Administrator]].  
+
Moreover, Zepheniah made bequests to other particular persons, thereby introducing them to the storyline. To [[Non-player characters#Barnabus Hale|Barnabus Hale]] he granted Mann & Sons Munitions Concern, which eventually became [[Mann Co.]] with Barnabus Hale's grandson [[Saxton Hale]] as CEO. To his maidservant [[Administrator#Elizabeth|Elizabeth]], he gave the [[w:Residuary estate|residue of his estate]] – Elisabeth is widely considered to be represented in the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/family_portrait/ ''Family Portrait''] as the woman sitting next to Zepheniah, bearing a passing fair resemblance to the [[Administrator]].  
  
−
In the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/the_last_will_and_testament_of_Zepheniah_Mann/ original publication], certain lines of testament are obscured by "[[w:sand|fool's gravel]]", which, when revealed in a later [https://www.teamfortress.com/mannwil hidden page] as part of the [[ARG#Mann_vs._Machine|ARG]] for the [[Mann vs. Machine (update)|Mann vs. Machine Update]], introduced a surprise character scheming to acquire the true wealth of Mann Co.. Zephaniah's "miracle" gravel is interpreted as [[Australium]], which is placed under Elizabeth's protection.
+
In the [https://www.teamfortress.com/pumpkinpatch/the_last_will_and_testament_of_Zepheniah_Mann/ original publication], certain lines of testament are obscured by "[[w:sand|fool's gravel]]", which, when revealed in a later [https://www.teamfortress.com/mannwill hidden page] as part of the [[ARG#Mann vs. Machine|ARG]] for the [[Mann vs. Machine (update)|Mann vs. Machine Update]], introduced a surprise character scheming to acquire the true wealth of Mann Co.. Zephaniah's "miracle" gravel is interpreted as [[Australium]], which is placed under Elizabeth's protection.
  
 
== Synopsis ==
 
== Synopsis ==
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* Zepheniah Mann spent his entire fortune speculating on gravel in New Mexico, but found only sand.
 
* Zepheniah Mann spent his entire fortune speculating on gravel in New Mexico, but found only sand.
 
* He declares that he suffered many medical conditions; somewhat fantastically named, several are real conditions, but using 19<sup>th</sup> Century diagnoses, such as [[w:Persistent Müllerian duct syndrome|superfluous uterus]], which is often a [[:File:Bloodbrothers8.jpg|hereditary condition]].
 
* He declares that he suffered many medical conditions; somewhat fantastically named, several are real conditions, but using 19<sup>th</sup> Century diagnoses, such as [[w:Persistent Müllerian duct syndrome|superfluous uterus]], which is often a [[:File:Bloodbrothers8.jpg|hereditary condition]].
−
* The residue of his estate not given to the "twins" or to Barnabas Hale is left to Elizabeth.
+
* The residue of his estate not given to the "twins" or to Barnabus Hale is left to Elizabeth.
−
* He gives Mann & Sons Munitions Concern (Mann Co.) to Barnabas Hale.
+
* He gives Mann & Sons Munitions Concern (Mann Co.) to Barnabus Hale.
−
* His properties in the [[w:Americas|Americas]] are evenly split between his two "brain defective" sons, [[RED|Redmond]] and [[BLU|Blutarch]].
+
* His properties in the [[w:Americas|Americas]] are evenly split between his two "brain defective" sons, {{botignore|[[RED|Redmond]] and [[BLU|Blutarch]]}}.
 
* ''[Hidden for three years until the Mann vs. Machine Update]''  
 
* ''[Hidden for three years until the Mann vs. Machine Update]''  
 
** Zephaniah places his cache of "miracle" gravel under the sworn protection of Elizabeth.
 
** Zephaniah places his cache of "miracle" gravel under the sworn protection of Elizabeth.
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Since moving from my Cambridgeshire estate to the untamed frontier I have contracted putrid fever, bilious fever, blackwater fever, green fever, spotted fever - even womb fever, as a complication from a serious bout of superfluous uterus. On our sailing trip to the new world I contracted white plague, marasmus, sweating sickness, deplumatious tumors of the eyelids, pleurisy, membranous croup and scarlet rash; during the drive west I contracted brain itch, stomatitus, and blood poisoning; since settling our estate I have contracted falling sickness, walking sickness, stationary sickness, shingles, jaundiced spine and skull bloat. I contracted scrivener's palsy in the writing of this last will & testament. Possessing no paper in this godforsaken frontier, I have penned this on my own skin, which has sloughed off in quantity since contracting impetigo.
 
Since moving from my Cambridgeshire estate to the untamed frontier I have contracted putrid fever, bilious fever, blackwater fever, green fever, spotted fever - even womb fever, as a complication from a serious bout of superfluous uterus. On our sailing trip to the new world I contracted white plague, marasmus, sweating sickness, deplumatious tumors of the eyelids, pleurisy, membranous croup and scarlet rash; during the drive west I contracted brain itch, stomatitus, and blood poisoning; since settling our estate I have contracted falling sickness, walking sickness, stationary sickness, shingles, jaundiced spine and skull bloat. I contracted scrivener's palsy in the writing of this last will & testament. Possessing no paper in this godforsaken frontier, I have penned this on my own skin, which has sloughed off in quantity since contracting impetigo.
  
−
To the foul-smelling, uneducated simpletons of the untamed Americas, I leave only this curse - as weapons have caused my downfall, so will I engineer the downfall of any soul who puts one to use near my restless grave. Shoot over my bones, and I shall visit upon you a haunting the likes of which you have never seen. To my dearest maidservant Elizabeth I leave the rest and residue of my estate - including all deeds, accounts, debts public and private - my tobacco plantation - and what remains of the fortune my addle-pated sons have squandered. Find the gravel that I was unable to find! Honor me by placing it inside a pit!  
+
To the foul-smelling, uneducated simpletons of the untamed Americas, I leave only this curse - as weapons have caused my downfall, so will I {{botignore|engineer}} the downfall of any soul who puts one to use near my restless grave. Shoot over my bones, and I shall visit upon you a haunting the likes of which you have never seen. To my dearest maidservant Elizabeth I leave the rest and residue of my estate - including all deeds, accounts, debts public and private - my tobacco plantation - and what remains of the fortune my addle-pated sons have squandered. Find the gravel that I was unable to find! Honor me by placing it inside a pit!  
  
−
To my faithful aide and tracker, Barnabas Hale of the savage Australians, I divest compleat control of the Mann & Sons Munitions Concern. You procured the poppy flowers required for the medicines that gave me succor from the pains of my many warring ailments. It has been pleasant to not shriek myself to sleep.  
+
To my faithful aide and tracker, Barnabus Hale of the savage Australians, I divest compleat control of the Mann & Sons Munitions Concern. You procured the poppy flowers required for the medicines that gave me succor from the pains of my many warring ailments. It has been pleasant to not shriek myself to sleep.  
  
 
To my layabout, brain defective sons, Blutarch and Redmond, I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud.
 
To my layabout, brain defective sons, Blutarch and Redmond, I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud.
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<div style="border: 1px solid #045FB4; margin: 2px auto; padding: 5px 5px">
 
<div style="border: 1px solid #045FB4; margin: 2px auto; padding: 5px 5px">
 
<span style="font-weight:bold; color:#045FB4;">This paragraph was originally obscured by sand</span><br>
 
<span style="font-weight:bold; color:#045FB4;">This paragraph was originally obscured by sand</span><br>
−
Lastly, to most trusted Elizabeth I leave the entirety of my "miracle" gravel cache, uncovered with Barnabas during a trip to Terra Australis. My weakling son Gray resurfaced last year and has threatened to blackmail me for it. I give the gravel to you and swear you to utmost secrecy in its keeping.  
+
Lastly, to most trusted Elizabeth I leave the entirety of my "miracle" gravel cache, uncovered with Barnabus during a trip to Terra Australis. My weakling son Gray resurfaced last year and has threatened to blackmail me for it. I give the gravel to you and swear you to utmost secrecy in its keeping.  
 
</div>
 
</div>
  
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; 2012
 
; 2012
 
* During an [[ARG#Mann vs. Machine|ARG event]] before the [[Mann vs. Machine (update)|Mann vs. Machine Update]], the full version of the last will was revealed in a hidden page.
 
* During an [[ARG#Mann vs. Machine|ARG event]] before the [[Mann vs. Machine (update)|Mann vs. Machine Update]], the full version of the last will was revealed in a hidden page.
−
** Despite not being connected to the last will directly, a [[:File:Blog Birth Certificate.jpg|birth certificate]] was also revealed in the event, mentioning Gray for the first time, as well as naming the midwife as Patience Meriwether and relating the sons to the [[Non-player_characters#Charles_Darling|Darling family]] through their mother.
+
** Despite not being connected to the last will directly, a [[:File:Blog Birth Certificate.jpg|birth certificate]] was also revealed in the event, mentioning Gray for the first time, as well as naming the midwife as Patience Meriwether and relating the sons to the [[Non-player characters#Charles Darling|Darling family]] through their mother.
  
 
; 2014
 
; 2014

Latest revision as of 11:15, 16 October 2023

The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann
The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann aka Issue 97.jpg
“
To my layabout, brain defective sons, Blutarch and Redmond, I leave the greatest curse of all - partnership. What land I have purchased in this new world is to be split evenly between you both. You have wasted your lives bickering over nothing, and so I leave you dimwits something of consequence over which to feud.
”

The Last Will and Testament of Zepheniah Mann is storyline content revealed in stages through hidden pages published in major updates.

Nominally, the Last Will and Testament was originally presented as the background for the game's first Halloween event, first Haunted map, and first Halloween Monster. However, in the course of his bequests, Zepheniah Mann describes his reasons for relocating to the Badlands and his unpleasant experiences there. Particularly, Zepheniah expressed his displeasure with his twin sons; and, so, he evenly divided the lands he purchased in the Americas between the two, establishing the basis for their conflict in the Badlands, known in the context of the Team Fortress 2 game as the Gravel War.

Moreover, Zepheniah made bequests to other particular persons, thereby introducing them to the storyline. To Barnabus Hale he granted Mann & Sons Munitions Concern, which eventually became Mann Co. with Barnabus Hale's grandson Saxton Hale as CEO. To his maidservant Elizabeth, he gave the residue of his estate – Elisabeth is widely considered to be represented in the Family Portrait as the woman sitting next to Zepheniah, bearing a passing fair resemblance to the Administrator.

In the original publication, certain lines of testament are obscured by "fool's gravel", which, when revealed in a later hidden page as part of the ARG for the Mann vs. Machine Update, introduced a surprise character scheming to acquire the true wealth of Mann Co.. Zephaniah's "miracle" gravel is interpreted as Australium, which is placed under Elizabeth's protection.

Synopsis

  • Zepheniah Mann vows to haunt the earth as a horrifying poltergeist.
  • Zepheniah Mann spent his entire fortune speculating on gravel in New Mexico, but found only sand.
  • He declares that he suffered many medical conditions; somewhat fantastically named, several are real conditions, but using 19th Century diagnoses, such as superfluous uterus, which is often a hereditary condition.
  • The residue of his estate not given to the "twins" or to Barnabus Hale is left to Elizabeth.
  • He gives Mann & Sons Munitions Concern (Mann Co.) to Barnabus Hale.
  • His properties in the Americas are evenly split between his two "brain defective" sons, Redmond and Blutarch.
  • [Hidden for three years until the Mann vs. Machine Update]
    • Zephaniah places his cache of "miracle" gravel under the sworn protection of Elizabeth.
    • Zephaniah mentions a third "weakling son", Gray, who is after the "miracle" gravel.

Transcript

Updates and references

See also: Hidden pages, ARG, Comics
2009
  • In the update page of Haunted Hallowe'en Special, the last will was introduced inside a hidden page, with some text covered by sand.
    • There is also a secret link inside the former page, which leads to another hidden page displaying a fragmentary portrait of Mann family.
    • The family portrait was later seen in the first TF2 storyline comic WAR!, kept by the Administrator on her control panel.
2010
2012
  • During an ARG event before the Mann vs. Machine Update, the full version of the last will was revealed in a hidden page.
    • Despite not being connected to the last will directly, a birth certificate was also revealed in the event, mentioning Gray for the first time, as well as naming the midwife as Patience Meriwether and relating the sons to the Darling family through their mother.
2014
  • In the comic Catch-Up, the story of Mann family, as written in the last will, was retrospected by Saxton Hale.

Gallery

  • The last will
    (partially obscured)

  • The last will
    (full version)

  • The Mann family portrait
    (left half)

  • The Mann family portrait
    (two pieces)

  • The birth certificate

See also

Retrieved from "https://wiki.teamfortress.com/w/index.php?title=The_Last_Will_and_Testament_of_Zepheniah_Mann&oldid=3535766"